Nearly 70 per cent of Kiwis wish they could get a second chance in some aspect of their life, a new survey shows.
The study, carried out by 2degrees, also shows men are more likely than women to want a second chance at a relationship, and millennials regret not pursuing sports more than other age groups do.
The research said the same things as similar international studies, said registered psychologist Susan Wall.
“International research shows around 70 per cent of people have some level of regret in their life.”
The researched surveyed more than 1000 New Zealand and found 69 per cent would take a second chance if given an opportunity, compared to 18 per cent who wouldn’t.
Of those second chances, nearly 30 per cent would choose a different field of work, while 16 per cent would reconnect with someone they lost touch with, and 12 per cent would try again with a failed relationship.
Men were twice as likely as women to want another chance at a relationship.
“By and large, research shows that males move on from relationship really quickly. I’ve seen it time and time again – a marriage breaks up and the male’s in a new relationship before you can sneeze,” Wall said.
Women, on the other hand, were more likely to emotionally resolve things before moving on, which could be why more men found themselves later in life regretting not trying harder for the relationship.
Some of the second chances respondents said they wanted ranged from poignant, including “getting mum’s melanoma treated earlier” and “not going to prison”, to positive, such as “learn more languages” and “become a guitar legend”.
When asked about the potential impact a second chance could have on their lives, 65 per cent of respondents said it would provide them with a greater sense of happiness, 37 per cent said it would improve their financial status, and one in five said it would give them a sense of fairness.
Of those surveyed, only 4 per cent said it wouldn’t have any impact on the life they lead.
Wall agreed many people would be happier if they had a second chance.
“It’s not outcome dependent, I think it’s the process of the second chance.”
She said it was important for people to look at what stopped them moving forward with a certain aspect of their life, so they could analyse what parts of it could apply to or be integrated into their lives now.
In a society that told people to “get over it”, it was good to acknowledge “It was important to you and it’s still important to you”.
Wall said the research indicated people were making choices based on what they felt they should do, rather than what they wanted to do, and for some people these decisions stuck with them much later in life.
“For some, just the thought of having a second chance is exciting, and to actually have that second chance can be life-changing – particularly for how we see ourselves, others, and the world.
“Maybe this will spur some people into taking the plunge and retraining for a new career or having one last attempt at that sporting dream.”
Kiwis’ big regrets
- 69 per cent would take a second chance if the opportunity arose
- 27 per cent would choose a different field of work
- 11 per cent would persevere at a sport
- 12 per cent would rekindle a romantic relationship
- 16 per cent would reconnect with someone they lost touch with
- Those aged 18-24 were most likely to want to try again at a sport, at 27 per cent
- 45-54 year olds had the strongest desire to change careers, at 35 per cent
